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Scott Francis Baker


November 21st, 2003

Contrary to popular opinion, Australians are not "...a dwarf bastard convict race" @ 01:07 pm

We're discussing what makes a "chick drink" and I came up with the following equation.

(num of non-alcoholic ingredients) / (num of alcoholic ingredients) = Num

If Num is greater than 1 than it's a "chick drink" otherwise you're fine. Also note that ice/water does not count as an ingredient.
 
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From:ferrell
Date:November 21st, 2003 02:08 pm (UTC)
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That equation is a guideline more than a rule; for example, anything with cabana boy in it is a chick drink. Also, those little paper umbrellas count as an ingredient.
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From:muerte
Date:November 21st, 2003 02:12 pm (UTC)
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Cabana boy in and of itself is not bad, it's still rum. It's just that MOST often it's used for girl drinks. I wouldn't consider you less of a man if you did a straight shot of CB.

However, I agree whole-heartedly on your paper umbrella adendum.
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From:themabbi
Date:November 21st, 2003 02:18 pm (UTC)
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It's may be rum, but it's girly fruit flavored rum. Nothing that comes in Kiwi Strawberry is manly. Besides, no matter what is inside, half naked pretty boys on the bottle = chick drink

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From:davidfrey
Date:November 21st, 2003 02:21 pm (UTC)
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You also need to take into consideration a few other variables. For instance, an Old Fashioned is made by muddling an orange and a cherry with a dash of bitters then filling the glass with bourbon or whiskey and a splash of soda water. So that makes 4 non-alcoholic ingredients to 1 alcoholic ingredient, but I have yet to meed a chick who likes it. The variables in this equation are:

r = quantity of non-sweet ingredients
s = quantity of sweet or fruity ingredients

You must consider the coefficient of these conditions in order to accurately build the equation. You must also take into consideration the volume ratio of sweet to non-sweet ingredients. One dash of bitters can easily cancel out a whole jigger of sweet alcohol. So the modified equation will look something like:

ChickDrink == ((s/n)/(n/a)) > .50

One last consideration must be made. Bitters are a powerful ingredient, so one must assume that a single dash of bitters equals 5 non-sweet ingredients. So to solve for chick on a few examples we have:

Old Fashion == ((2/(2+5)(4/1)) = .07
Long Island == ((4/3)(5/2)) = .53
Cosmopolitan == ((4/1)(3/2)) = 2.66

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From:muerte
Date:November 24th, 2003 03:41 pm (UTC)
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You put way too much thought into that answer!
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From:davidfrey
Date:November 24th, 2003 04:17 pm (UTC)
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Hey, a formula must accurately solve the problems its intended to. :) Plus I was tired of the lecture in my class.
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From:potsie
Date:November 24th, 2003 05:25 pm (UTC)
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I think the general rule is that if it tastes like cherry koolaid coming up then it's a chick drink.

Scott Francis Baker