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Scott Francis Baker


May 21st, 2001

I was quit when I come in here... I'm twice as quit now. @ 12:03 pm

* A person needs only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and it shouldn't, use the tape.

* When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.

* The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: "I apologize" and "You are right."

* Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

* When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.

* If he or she says that you are too good for him -- believe it.

* I've learned to pick my battles; I ask myself, "Will this matter one year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?"

* Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

* If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!

* Living well really is the best revenge.

* Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just proves that the other person was right about you.

* Be really nice to your friends because you never know when you are going to need them to empty your bed pan and hold your hand.

* And finally... Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect; it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.

-- author unknown
 
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Comments

 
From:bigj
Date:May 21st, 2001 07:12 pm (UTC)
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The worst thing to say to your pregnant wife is that "I know that baby doesn't weigh 40 pounds"

DL Hugley
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From:muerte
Date:May 21st, 2001 07:25 pm (UTC)
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BAHAHAHAHAHA!

Scott Francis Baker